In my last post about the differences between introverted, shy, reserved, and HSP, I stated that I believe I express emotions through pain. And then I connected it to Dabrowski’s Theory of Positive Disintegration and Overexcitabilities. Only, when Taryn asked in the comments for more resources, I realized that the information wasn’t as explicit as I remembered.
Why don’t you start at the beginning?
So, I’ve spent the last few days going back through my path to that realization in hopes that maybe it can help you too. On a side note, when I look at my circle of introverted, shy, reserved, HSP darlings, I can’t help but notice how many of us have pain/fatigue/migraine problems. This could be an issue of correlation v. causality, but either way, I find it interesting.
I’ve had a pain disorder for about fourteen years now. I have joint inflammation that you can feel as heat through my skin. My joints swell and make cracking sounds and I’ve worn away most of the cartilage in my knees. When looking at my joint scan, my doctor said it looked like I was lit up like the fourth of July (the colors indicating inflammation). I’ve also got some mild spinal fusing. I’ve previously had to quit a job, withdraw from school, and stop driving because I couldn’t function from the pain, all of which have been resumed/completed since.
I’ve had over $10,000 in tests done (I had great insurance at the time, thankfully) and not one had a positive result. Any diagnosis I have received was based entirely on my symptoms, but none of the three diagnoses I’ve received fit well with all of the symptoms.
All of this is to explain why I started looking into pain and stress. By nature I am a researcher; I love words and science and explanations. Research is my security blanket and I mentally collect information then tie it together with previous research. So, the short version of what got me here:
And so the dominos fall…
My mother, a nurse, got me started reading Dr. Andrew Weil’s book Eight Weeks to Optimum Health (not an affiliate link, but I strongly recommend it). He talks about stress and how it exacerbates inflammation.
A bit later, Caroline Myss had a column in a national women’s magazine, no idea which one, where she would work with readers to find the emotional root of their physical pain. She has since written a book, Emotional Anatomy and its follow up, Advanced Emotional Anatomy. I’ve downloaded the first one to listen to, but I may have to wait until I have a bit of vacation at the end of the month.
Then my dad began talking to me about a book he was reading, Molecules of Emotion by Candace Pert, PhD. He told me that Dr. Pert wrote that our emotions are biochemically based, to do with neuropeptides to be a bit more precise. This book also sits in my queue and, of course, I’ll share my response if you’re interested.
Later I read about how depression often goes undiagnosed because of atypical symptoms like loss of energy, difficulty making decisions, increased need for sleep, unexplained pain, and stomach ache and digestive problems. There are other symptoms, but those were the ones that I remember because they fit my situation.
So when I encountered Dabrowski’s Overexcitabilities I already had a background of knowledge relating to the correlation between mind and body as related to pain and stress. Several sites use the phrase “Physical expression of emotions” and some refer to a physical response to emotions, like having a stomach ache. I did finally find one site that mentions “stomach upset and nausea to more serious “gut” issues, nervousness, muscle tension, or other discomforts”, but it is a layman’s site, and I’m not sure what her sources are, although I have asked and will let you know what she says. *update* Lisa, from Everyday Intensity, got back to me with the recommendation to look at The Feeling of What Happens: Body and Emotion in the Making of Consciousness by Antonio Damasio. So, that’s on the reading list now too, but I have only been able to find it as an actual book, as opposed to a digital or audio book, so I may have to wait a bit to get my hands on it.
Bringing all this together, I believe that there are a wide variety of ways humans process emotion, and I personally, experience intense emotions that I can’t always handle and the excess comes through as physical stress, tension, and pain. If anyone has an interest in researching this further, I would love to talk to you and would especially enjoy hearing from someone who has done or wants to do any formal research.
I know that we are all especially sensitive to the discussion of our reactions-illnesses-sensitivities and I’d like to make a special request that we be extra gentle in the comments on this one. Please feel free to ask for more specifics or tell your story if you would like. I think by sharing our views and experiences with this we might all gain a bit of insight into our own situations and maybe we can learn from each other.
In the comments:
We’re being open here, sharing and saying things we don’t always say out loud. What helps: Sharing your stories and Ideas. Cheering and telling what works/worked for you. What hurts: shoulds, harshness, and such. (I used to teach first grade, I can’t help it.)
